


what moments divine

by slightlyraspberry



Category: The West Wing
Genre: Established Relationship, F/M, M/M, One Shot, POV Outsider, Pining, Sam wins the election
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-26
Updated: 2020-07-26
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:22:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,246
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25528132
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/slightlyraspberry/pseuds/slightlyraspberry
Summary: Josh watches them and wonders.
Relationships: Josh Lyman/Donna Moss, Will Bailey/Sam Seaborn
Comments: 12
Kudos: 28





	what moments divine

**Author's Note:**

> Title and lyrics below are from "Begin the Beguine" by Cole Porter. Set in S6 for peak pining.

_what moments divine,  
what rapture serene,  
'til clouds came along to disperse the joys we had tasted.  
and now when I hear people curse the chance that was wasted,  
I know but too well what they mean._

Josh doesn’t have a lot of favors to go around. He serves at the pleasure of the President, after all. All favors by rights belong to President Bartlet. 

But if there’s anyone he’ll do a favor for, it’s Sam. That’s why he’s standing here, in the corner of a Four Seasons ballroom, pulling at his tie and wishing he had a drink in his hand. 

Donna would get him a drink. But Donna’s not here. Or if she is here, she’s not paying attention to him. 

Actually, now that he thinks about it, Donna probably _wouldn’t_ get him a drink. She’s the reason he stopped drinking gin and tonic and started drinking just plain tonic.

“Josh,” she had said, “you can’t get any work done if you get wasted off of two drinks.”

“M’not wasted,” he replied. He hadn’t been wasted. Perhaps a little tipsy. But there were a few senators that actually responded _better_ to him when he was loosened up. Something about him losing his bite. He told Donna as such.

“Neither of said senators is here,” she had responded, and placed a glass of virgin something in his hand. And that was that. Donna got to come to fancy parties from then on, in exchange for keeping Josh on his toes.

But Donna is no longer here. His new assistant doesn’t care to come to events—she’s more worried about reorganizing Donna’s careful filing system. 

So he’s here as a favor to Sam. Josh is pretty sure he’s supposed to be doing something besides just showing up. Talking to donors or voters or some congressmen he’s hoping to bully into supporting some new legislation—action is what makes a favor a favor, after all, not just moping around in a corner. But instead, he’s leaning with his back against the ballroom wall, searching the crowd for someone, anyone who might not be miserable to talk to, and again longing for Donna to place a drink (preferably alcoholic) in his hand. 

Instead he sees Will Bailey, that son of a bitch.

He should’ve figured he’d be here. It’s Sam’s re-election benefit, after all, and Sam and Will are rarely apart these days. Not that Sam’s going to get re-elected. It’s a miracle he even got elected in the first place, after the shitshow Scott Holcomb was running, and Josh can think of at least two reasons he stands no chance in CA-47 next year. 

The first, of course, comes down to the little (D) that will follow ”Samuel Seaborn” on the ballot. The second starts with “g” and ends with “-ay agenda.”

And if Sam’s happy, Josh is happy, but God damn him if he understands why Sam threw away his political career to date Will-fucking-Bailey.

Josh thinks maybe Will was just persistent. That seems to be his main purpose in life—being persistent on behalf of other people. First it was for Wilde, causing this whole mess for Sam in the first place. Now it’s for Russell—and Will’s persistence is really foiling Josh’s plans at every turn. Leaving the West Wing and making Toby miserable, stealing Donna and making _Josh_ miserable, really just _trying_ to ruin Josh’s life at this point.

But Sam likes Will enough to ruin his career for him, and Josh will do anything for Sam, so he’ll tolerate Will. He doesn’t even have to talk to him tonight. It’s a big fundraiser with a long guest list, and he can probably scoot by without more than a cursory greeting.

Josh watches Will move through the crowded dance floor to make sure he can go in the opposite direction. Will, because he likes making things difficult for Josh as a fun pastime, is headed straight for Sam. 

Great. Now he has to wait until Will is gone to give Sam his polite regards and make a speedy exit. And based on the way Will is pulling Sam away from the latest Washington somebody, Josh thinks his exit is going to be a lot less speedy than originally planned.

Will’s pulling Sam by the wrist. He smiles as he makes an inaudible excuse to the somebody, and Sam smiles back. Josh wants to look away desperately, wants to find literally anyone else to talk to, but he can’t. 

Because despite the fact that they’re in the middle of a dance floor with about 200 high-powered Democrat socialites and Will-fucking-Bailey has a hold on his hand, Sam looks happy. Josh can see him laughing as Will pulls him into a sort-of embrace, his arm coming around Will’s waist like it’s the most natural thing in the world. His eyes, even from this far away, are sparkling. And that’s not a word Josh uses often, but they really are sparkling quite a lot. But Sam’s baby blues, as much as they sparkle, could never compare to Donna’s. 

He watches them. Sam and Donna’s new boss. They’re moving together in a jokey imitation of swing dancers, and Josh marvels at the easy physicality they have. Sam holds his arm up to spin Will around, and Will laughs. Josh can’t hear him, but he sees the way Will’s eyes shine with mirth and snap back to Sam’s as soon as he turns all the way around.

They look like a couple in a movie, all blissful happiness and ignorance of the world around them. Josh has never known what that feels like. He’s never been as happy with anyone as Sam looks to be with Will.

Is that kind of love (because that’s what Josh is seeing, Sam and Will in love) really worth it?

Sam gave up everything for this. Josh knows every person in this room would shake their heads and pull out receipts of their support for gay marriage if accused of homophobia, but he also knows very few of them have given any form of support to Sam since that photo of him and Will hit the papers. Even in California, even in Washington, D.C., “gay” is somehow the antonym to “electable.” 

But looking at the way Sam grasps Will’s shoulders and kisses his cheek, watching Sam smile at Will over his shoulder as he walks away, seeing Will’s infuriatingly goofy smile melt into a lovestruck gaze at Sam’s retreating figure, Josh knows that love must be worth it.

He’s never had the kind of love they seem to have. His relationships are all arguing and debating and (admittedly hot but) very angry sex, and never giving things up for each other. Will and Sam gave up everything for each other. Maybe that's why they seem so happy. It must be nice to matter that much to someone.

For a moment he thinks of Donna and everything she gave up for him. He thinks of giving up his job, his world, his life to have her in his arms.

But he doesn’t search for Donna in the crowd or pull out his cell phone to give her a call. He peels himself off the wall and goes to the open bar. He orders himself a tonic, this time with gin in it. And he goes back to leaning on the wall and sips the drink that Donna did not order for him.

**Author's Note:**

> Sam and Will are probably, at least in my head, dancing to the Ella Fitzgerald version of "Beguine," which is excellent. Please kudos and comment if you liked, and thanks for reading! You can find me at slightlyraspberry on tumblr and @samseabxrn on twitter.


End file.
